Lester’s Fixins Ranch Dressing Soda

**Editor's Note - I completely forgot to post this review when I wrote it all the way back on April 21, 2016.  I could totally back log the publish date, but I'm going to lazily push this to the front to make up for my lack of current reviews.  It's what those in the beverage profession call 'stat padding'.**

I’m not going to hem and haw all that much here.  I’m about to drink a Ranch Dressing Soda by Lester’s Fixins.  With a surprisingly short ingredient list of Carbonated Water, Sugar, Sodium Benzoate, gum acacia, natural flavor, and ester gum, I’m a little impressed/concerned.  Let’s just get to it.

It smells like ranch dressing, but it looks like milky water.  I’m not sure how I can elaborate on that anymore.  So at least smell wise it does what’s expected.

There’s two parts to this soda.  The very beginning is full of bubbles and liquid, with no discernable ranch flavor.  For a blink in time this beverage seems like it could be related to a cream soda.  It’s true, but it’s such a tiny sliver of time that if you added up all the sips it would take to drink it you’d get maybe a quarter of a second of this flavor.  

I  just burped and it tasted like carrots and ranch.

The ranch dressing flavor at the end is fairly accurate, as accurate as a carbonated, aqueous ranch dressing could taste.  Honestly though, and it’s been driving me crazy until right now, this tastes like something else too.  Hydrogen Peroxide.  Obviously I haven’t consumed Hydrogen Peroxide, but I have swished it around in my mouth a time or two.  That said, please don’t consider this an endorsement for ingesting Hydrogen Peroxide.  There are so many better sodas out there.

So I’m about halfway done with the bottle and I really want to stop.  I shouldn’t take anymore sips as I feel it’ll make me fall ill, but I gotta try just one more to write the overview.  

Nope.  I just tasted it and the burn from the ranch combined with the H2O2 taste made me immediately regret my decision.  What a terrible decision it was too.  Bleh.

Verdict - Do Not Buy


This was purchased from Rocket Fizz Houston