Avery's Monster Mucus

There aren’t many words that gross me out when I hear/read them.  I’d put the over-under at about 10 total that I’ve come across.  Sadly one of those words is in the title of today’s beverage.  Avery’s Monster Mucus… ugggh.. is in front of me and my throat will convulse every time I type the word mucus.  A couple of nice ladies, Alice & Diane, are the reason this repulsive bottle of liquid is in front of me; I must thank them both.  There’s a Simpson-esque slime man on the bottle that I’m supposing we’re to believe is the creator of this beverage.  I mean he is a monster and I can only assume he’s secreting mucus, so I’m thinking the story goes that I’m about to drink him.  Thankfully there’s also a proper flavor listing of Strawberry/Blue Raspberry on the label as well.  Oh, and the label uses one of my favorite made up words “SODAsgusting”.  That’s fantastic and I really have nothing else to say about it.

Twist is vomiting

The blue raspberry is clearly the boss around here as I can’t even tell that strawberry is in the mix due to the pungent aroma of the former.  With a second whiff I think I’m getting a touch of the tartness found in your friendly neighborhood strawberry.  Perhaps I should drink it to make further observations.

The first sip is a little underwhelming as both tastes seems to cancel each other out and create almost a non-taste.  Maybe my mouth just needs a few more sips to acclimate to this new environment.  As I work my way further down the bottle a noticeable blue raspberry taste shows up, but does not really impress me.  True to its weak scent the strawberry thought better than to appear today, letting the blue raspberry take the brunt of the criticism.  Each sip also brings the taste of grape to my lips as well.  This grape/raspberry flavoring coupled with the sharp carbonation creates a fairly average fruit flavored soda.  Yes it’s sweetened with cane sugar, but you always run the risk of having a very vague soda flavor when you start combining fruit.  It seems that’s what’s happened here with Avery’s Monster Mucus.  With such an “out-there” flavor name I was hoping for something that would be memorable.  Instead I got a flavor combination that while somewhat tasty will be forgotten in a matter of days.

Verdict – Buy a Bottle

~A